Day Two Hundred and Eighty seven

A long sit today. I notice my relationship to tiredness, discomfort. I struggle with it. I let go of struggle at times. I often reach in my mind for some magic phrase I have heard in books or on retreat to help me let go, but they usually do not have life for me. They are not direct in this moment. What is here is centering and noticing. I go back to touching again and again. I notice my mind becoming calmer. Doubt becomes a sort of companion that I outlast, not to get somewhere (that strategy seems to be just battling back) but to just be here. Awareness opens up on its own. Deeper levels of doubt are there that will require more patience and perseverance.